Fifty Shades of Debate

fifty shades

Hi Guys! Scrolling down my Facebook profile this morning and yesterday, I have decided, after some inner debate that I need to get something off of my chest about Fifty Shades of Grey. I believe that this is the best place to do it as well – considering we are talking about what was a book franchise turned film franchise.

Scrolling down the ever ominous page that is my home page on Facebook, I keep seeing a whole lot of mixed reviews about Fifty Shades. Some loved it – both the film and the books. I am one who absolutely adored the books and I am dragging my husband to see the film this evening. There are others who didn’t like it – which I have no problem with, each to their own. There are others, however, who are claiming that Fifty Shades is an abusive relationship being sold as a love story – and the worst thing is that there are people agreeing with it who haven’t read the book. I think this is what is bugging me the most – the fact that they haven’t experienced it for themselves – so how do they know.

Here is one article I read – from someone who did apparently read the books – who believes that this is an abusive relationship being sold as a love story: Written in the Independent by Beth Penny. My friend actually reposted this agreeing with the statements made, without having read the books themselves.

However, I am someone who completely disagrees with what has been written in the article. I feel like the author of the article has taken out bits and pieces of the just the first book and she has placed them out of context, indeed making it look like an abusive relationship.

What a lot of people are not seeming to understand is that throughout this book, it was a consensual thing between two adults. Within the article, it is mentioned that Christian Grey wanted to micro manage her life through what and when she ate, exercising, sleeping habits, who she hangs out with etc. What is not mentioned in this article is the contract. Mr. Grey had a contract drawn up and signed with all of his partners, so there was going to be no difference with Ana either. What also isn’t mentioned is the fact that the contract was negotiated and they both managed to come to a conclusion in an adult manner about what was acceptable and what was not. What also isn’t mentioned is the fact that, while this contract was not signed, Ana always went and did what she wanted anyway, and remained an independent woman!

The fact that Grey had her tracked, knew where she lived and worked etc, is kind of creepy. I will give you that. However, later on you, as a reader, find out that Grey had a background check done on all of his potential partners, including Ana and, when Ana found out, she was given the file and told that she could do what she wanted with it. I believe this was in the second book – after she left and came back. It is also mentioned that he turned up in the same hotel that she was staying at when she was visiting her mother and insisted that he be introduced as a boyfriend and he forces her to have his picture taken with him at her graduation. What isn’t mentioned it why he even turned up upon her visitation with her mother and why he was at her graduation. None of this is mentioned, therefore creating a biased view of what is actually going on.

What is also missing is the fact that, these books aren’t just about the story and the evolution of Ana and her BDSM relationship with Christian. It is also about the evolution of Christian as a character. What nobody seems to be focusing on, either because they have not read the books or because they have been swayed by the ever present media, is that Christian Grey changes as a character as the series continues. We begin to understand why he is the way he is/was and the changes he actually makes to have the chance to stay in Ana’s life.

Love it or hate it – at least read the book before judging. Yes, you can have your own opinion as to what you believe this relationship to be, whether it abusive or nay. I just feel that people should not be taking quotes and parts of books out of context just to prove a point. And yes, I will be giving my money to this franchise, because I enjoy it! I don’t want to be judged for enjoying something that someone else doesn’t. Like I said, each to their own.

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